Before I was a Counsellor, I was this…

Before I was a counsellor, I spent nearly a decade working front-line at a treatment centre, A lot of my colleagues at the treatment centre were past substance users. All with incredible life stories. The clients came from every walk of life - mandated from jail, high-level executives, parents, elders and young adults. What they shared was this incredible moment in time, where they could come to collaboratively heal together.

Over those years, I learned more than I ever could from textbooks or training.I witnessed transformation, struggle, resilience and loss.

Here’s what I carry with me from those years on the front-lines.

• I learned that it's never to late to start "healing".

• As an indigenous person who is doing the work of decolonizing my internalized racism - I learned that it wasn't only the indigenous people who had substance use problems. That trauma affects all people.

• When you came to the program, it didn't matter if you were mandated and came from jail, were a high corporate worker, a miner, a father, a stay-at-home mom, retired, rich, poor, 18 or 80 years old, everyone was there for the same reason

• I got to be involved in therapeutic spaces, where vulnerability was at the heart of many of my interactions. That therapeutic conversations take place in all types of settings. That sometimes the best conversations took place sitting at the dining room table playing cards, having a cigarette or doing a puzzle

• I watched the clients care for one another.

• I watched them transform in the structured environment.

• I watched them return to the program after they would go home when the environment wasn't controlled anymore.

• I had hard conversations about boundaries and gift giving and intentions

• I learned what it feels like to burn out

• I learned that people want human interaction with a real person, they are curious about you too.

• I had people question my qualifications, my age, my intention, my judgement, my life experience and my knowledge

• I watched my high school friends that I partied with start to go into the program

• I learned that the government doesn't live by the same rules as the indigenous rules - the government is trying to tick off boxes.

• I learned that AA is not the only way to sobriety - but many of the old timers will tell you that it is

• I learned that the cook, the maintenance man, the support workers are equally important to making a program run and all have gifts to contribute

• I learned as much as you want, you can't will people to getting "better" or "sober"

• I learned it wasn't our job to make people stay in the program

• I learned that the mindfulness we talked about in the program was the same as the one I was learning about in yoga

• I learned I would never move up in my career unless I got my master’s degree

• I learned that who’s in management impacts the work significantly

• I learned that some of the counsellors would look down on us other workers

• I learned that I would connect well with some people, and not others and that's okay

• I learned about reciprocity. That the clients also like to "take care of you too" and it's okay to accept it. Sometimes they don't have anything to offer but to pour you a cup of coffee or teaching you a new skill

• I learned laughter is good medicine

• I learned about apologies and taking responsibility when I've unintentionally harmed someone

• I learned about asking if I've unintentionally harmed someone

• I learned about goodbyes at the end of the program

• I learned about deep connection and then you sometimes never hear from that person again

• I learned some people don't "get better" and that some of them pass away

• I learned that the time I got to spend with the clients is precious and meaningful and I got to meet the clients when they weren't using substances, and seen a different version of them than the rest of the world would get to see 

• I learned the importance of play. And that adults we sometimes forget (we would go bowling or swimming and these older men would light up with joy and laughter. It was really beautiful)

• I learned how lonely it can be trying to change your entire life when the rest of your world doesn't change and often that prevents people from making changes. That Before making assumptions about why people aren't changing, to make sure you understand what "giving that thing up" actually means

• I learned about shame, fear and bravery of every single person who walked through the doors, and that I could help alleviate some of this by being welcoming, kind, and gentle

• I learned to compartmentalize what was going on in my personal life from my professional life.

• I learned to rely on my myself and support the decisions of my shift partner

• I learned that ethics are judged, accepted or normalized based on the environment you are in.

 I sometimes still feel like I have something to prove as a counsellor, as if my many years of experience before earning the title don’t “count”. But the truth is, this work didn’t start when I got a degree. It started in conversations over puzzles and cigarettes, in witnessing people at their most vulnerable, in learning that healing doesn’t follow a linear path.

Now, with a new title and new responsibilities I hold onto these lessons. They remind me that therapy isn’t just about therapy - it’s about being human with people.

If you are on the front-lines I see you, I honour the work you are doing. and I hope you are taking care of yourself. The world needs you

with love

Chantelle